Beautiful is a word easily thrown around. However, courageous, free-spirited and determined are also words to describe women and, in this case, Nondumiso Shabangu.
The birth of a daughter
Nondumiso was born in
To this day, Noliqhwa is the name her father still fondly calls his daughter despite the fact that she never spent much time with him. When her parents separated when she was four years old, her mother packed the young girl and her brother to live with her in the City of
The Move to
The small family knew no one in
Despite her best efforts, Nondumiso’s mother could not afford to take care of the young girl who was of a sickly disposition in need of regular medical care. The decision was made for the two children to move back to
Living with Dad
‘The circumstances forced me to grow up at a very tender age, which meant I had to learn how to cook and bath my brother when I was only seven. We missed our mother dearly and we couldn’t wait for her monthly visits just to see her and what she brought for us from Joburg.’
Again, despite her father’s best efforts, tensions between her parents forced her mother to take the children with her back to
The Hunger for Education
Growing up brought many challenges, which forced this fiery spirit to take a step back and analyse who she was and what she really wanted from life. Having matriculated in 2005, she found she couldn’t go further with her education due to financial constraints. Forced to find a job and make some money, she worked hard and started climbing the corporate ladder when she was only 20. And yet, with all her achievements, Nondumiso just wasn’t happy. Something was missing.
‘I was in misery. I resented everything about my life: my job, my relationships, my mother for making me work and myself for not having strength to pull myself out of it and start appreciating what I had.’
Nondumiso Realises She is Unhappy and Desires More
However, in 2009 Nondumiso took the decision to change her life. This bright spark saw it as her beginning, admitting, ‘I faced my fears and admitted that at 21 I was miserable and I felt trapped in a 41-year-old woman’s body.’
And so started her journey to become what she has always wanted to be – a journalist. She has since enrolled at the Tshwane University of Technology and is a first-year journalism student. ‘I still can’t believe I can say it in one line and smile about it.’
Spiritual Beliefs
Guiding her through her dark hours were her strong spiritual beliefs. Nondumiso appreciates the tradition of her culture, understanding that her ancestors and forefathers had their own beliefs and rituals before the advent of colonialism. She thrills at discovering her ancestry and preserving her cultural roots, which she hopes to pass on to her children and, in turn, their children.
‘I sometimes fear that there will come a time were there’s a generation of black children who will not even be able to utter a word in isiZulu or seSotho because we have moved so far away from our cultures.’
A Woman’s Hopes and Dreams
Nevertheless, this is a driven individual who hopes to see herself practising journalism in the broadcasting industry, either as a producer or news anchor. With her three-year plan intact, she knows she will complete her studies and do her internship with a willing corporation.
However, she does realise that life doesn’t always go according to plan and has made provision for a Plan B, but no matter what happens she envisions herself as ‘a successful woman doing her thing and playing a major role in changing young people’s lives, but mostly to be an inspiration and enjoy my family and to have a family. That is very important to me.’
That said, Nondumiso is currently single, although she does say there is someone on whom she has her eye, but all in all her studies come first. However, she is looking for a partner who can be ‘a friend, a caregiver, a gentle soul, someone understanding, forgiving and definitely someone that can make me laugh and enjoy my life with him.’
Losing a Loved One
Nondumiso espouses the importance of family and another of her life’s challenges that she had to learn to overcome was the sudden death of her grandmother. In a moment of quiet contemplation she says, ‘I still regret never having the chance to have a peaceful relationship with her. We were always at each other’s throats, but that didn’t mean we hated each other. I miss her, I could have learnt a lot from her given the chance.’
Nondumiso Laughs Loud and Dreams Big
In her spare time, this lady loves to laugh. One should never underestimate the healing power of laughter. She also loves sleeping and all the normal things most girls like, such as shopping, movies, parties, picnics, reading, fashion and gaming.
Being a South African sister, Nondumiso sees Mzansi as, ‘a developing country that mostly has its setbacks, but is well on the way to realising the “African Dream”.’ And though she praises the inroads women have successfully made in all sectors of our country, she does feel there is one issue women need to address and that is self-love.
‘We have forgotten the value of confidence and the impact it has. Women hide underneath their weaves and artificial nails because an “afro” is no longer a good enough look? The world has set these ridiculous standards for woman that is impossible for people to be themselves as they truly are.’
