Sexual language goes way beyond the words, which are important, the REAL words. Because more people speak Euphemism than Sexual. As in ‘they slept together, he slept with me, I slept her, him, them...’

As far as I understand it, and I’ve had a little experience in this, sleeping and sex are different activities. Very Different. When we use language that’s not sexual, it’s so difficult, sometimes impossible, to talk about the issues and problems we have. And communication is possibly 80% of solving problems.

Problems

Before we even get to having the problems, how do we expect to teach our children effectively about sex if we can’t teach them to speak Sexual? This is not just about the words; it’s a culture that allows for open, honest, non-judgmental sex education and understanding.

It needs to be as normal as talking about groceries, movies and music, where it becomes a way of communicating that creates an awareness of us as sexual and sensual beings. When we speak Sexual we own ourselves, we own our sexuality, and we take responsibility for our pleasure. It becomes an integral part of our self-definition, not something we take out of a box occasionally, use and lock away again.

Sex Words

Besides all the sex words for our genitals, we talk about ‘private place and down there’. You won’t find those terms in any anatomy book. So we become separated from our bodies. Even more so when they tell us ‘don’t touch, it’s dirty, it’s nasty, you’re going to go blind, get sick…’

And the Sex Words become Dirty Words. And we use fuck as a swear word. It may be one of the most expressive words there is, being able to be used in so many contexts and ways, verb, noun, adjective and adverb. It’s made an amazing leap from Sexual to English.

Good

So if Sex Words are Dirty, if Sex Organs are Dirty, how can sex be Good? How can it be Fun, Exciting, Healing, Loving, Pleasurable, Spiritual, Empowering, Liberating, beautiful, Transformative, Creative, Magical, Ecstatic, Transcendent etc. (These are all words that have come across from Sexual). We’ve fucked-up, Big Time!

And then we’ve added a whole bunch of Real Swear Words to Sexual. Dirty, Guilty, Shameful, Embarrassing, Fear, Perverse, Judgment, Wrong, Suppressed, Repressed…

Beauty

In truth, Sexual is a language of such beauty, such poetry. It allows us to create and express the highest aspects of ourselves, the Holiest, the Most Sacred, the Most Blissful, and the Most Beautiful we are. 

Sexual is the language of the Heart, the Soul expressed through the body. And we all actually know how to speak Sexual, if we will but allow ourselves…