In so many lessons, talks and workshops I talk about the connection between yoni and lingam and the heart. Yoni and lingam are the Tantric terms for the vagina and penis. During an incredibly beautiful massage the other night I had a major realisation. In short: our heart limits the pleasure we feel.

Let’s begin exploring this with some background.

Limiting Pleasure

From the experiences I’ve had over the years of exploring sexuality and sensuality and the spiritual connection I’ve come to see that so many people limit their pleasure. Most if this is unconscious; we’re simply not aware of it.

This is not to say that you have a bad relationship or sex life. It simply means that most of us limit the pleasure that’s possible. A 30 or 40 second orgasm, everything squeezing and contracting, breath gasping, body heaving, nerves pulsing like a screaming electric guitar is good, sometimes it’s great, wonderful…

But there’s more. So much more.

What Prevents Us Experiencing Pleasure

There are so many aspects to this, so many things that prevent us experiencing more pleasure. There are the limitations caused by such things as lack of technique, lack of patience, lack of connection and lack of preparation.

There are the body issues of numbness in the genitals, energy channels that are not open, nerves that are not experiencing what they’re capable of. There are the emotions of fear and anger that sit in the yoni and lingam, that have a huge impact on pleasure.

Then there is the connection between our heart and sacred sexual centres.

So what’s the limitation here, what’s the connection?

Lack of Connection

The first thing is the lack of connection. Before going further into this, let’s be clear on something. This connection has impact on all aspects of your sex life and relationship.

But where it becomes most apparent and has the most impact is in such things as the special experiences, the Tantric lovemaking, the deep massage, yoni massage, lingam massage, Taoist Sexual Energy Massage, Tantric Massage and Sacred Sex Experiences. The more connected these two centres are, the more you’ll feel, physically and emotionally, all the time.

The lack of connection separates the experiences. It makes something sexual or emotional, there’s naturally a little mixing, but…When your heart is not open, what you’re going to experience physically is but a fraction of the energy available.

Heart is about Openness

Because the heart is about openness, it’s about vulnerability, it’s about being fully present and conscious, being in the moment, in your body, in your feelings. And this is the key. This is where it happens.

The power in the body is so great, the energy of pleasure is so strong it literally is mind-blowing. It has the ability to take you to places that you absolutely cannot talk, cannot move beyond the waves of energy that writhe through your body, places that you’ve dreamed about, a different level of consciousness.

But you need the connection to get there.

Everything Filtered

Everything else, every other experience is filtered. The filters are past experiences, the future, fantasies, other thoughts, limiting beliefs and fears.

The fears are big, fears of letting go, really letting go, showing all that you are, screaming in your passion, allowing your being, your soul to touch your body, to show it’s light.

The heart is the interface. The energy flows from your yoni or lingam through your heart, deeper inside, outside, everywhere you are, shows you how vast you are, how beautiful, how powerful, how tender.

Needing Your Body

You need the body. It’s the base of it all. The beautiful flower of your yoni, the power of your lingam are the entrance. They provide the fuel. The more skilful your touch, the more you can build the fire, stroke and touch, read your partner’s body and respond, drive the flames through their body, open the energy channels, the deeper the sensation, the greater the pleasure.

On their own, the physical pleasure is wonderful, the emotional aspect is good. When they’re together, literally, the sky and beyond, the most distant stars, simply limitless…

It’s all about love. LOVE.

Feeling Love

When your heart is open, you feel love. When you can feel this, you can feel safe, you can feel vulnerable, you can feel open. You can FEEL. EMOTION. Energy that moves. It moves up your body, from the wet, from the heat of your sex to your heart, then back, stronger, deepening the sensation, heightening your nerves, opening, spreading, burning.

Then back to your heart, more open, a higher vibration, getting closer to ECSTASY, to BLISS. Back and forth, up and down your body, a current of electric sex, liquid that dissolves you, melts you, expands you to who you really are, a being of BEAUTY, PLEASURE, LOVE AND ECSTASY.

You are.